By Tanisha K. Wright

“Halo! Welcome to YourDead Inc. What can I help you with today?” Smiled the woman behind the purple counter.

“I’m dead?” I said slowly. Weird my voice sounds different. Rather what did my voice sound like before? I can’t remember anything.

The woman continued to give me a painted smile, “Well,” she paused to look around, I followed her gaze and saw a skeleton wearing a top hat, walking. I slowly turned back to face her, she placed her fingers over her lips and a light giggle came out of her. “You wouldn’t be here if you were alive sweetie.” She proceed to file through some papers then turned her eyes on me once more, “So,” she huffed and smiled, “What can we at YourDead Inc. do for you today?”

I simply stared at her never changing facial expression of a fake smile. I then noticed that her eyes were two different colors and before I could exam her appearance any further, a cough behind catches my attention. I spun around and there stood a whale of a man very closely behind me on this seemingly endless line. The man looks at me with an impatient stare but then he goes into a coughing fit, which results in his left eyeball jumping out of the socket and it hits me in the face. It felt lukewarm and kind of sticky when it hit my cheek and I didn’t know how to handle the situation, so I stood very still. As I was contemplating what logic there could be for this, the man started shoving his eye back into the socket.

“Can you hurry it up man?” The guy said, with his thumb in his eye trying to fix it back in place. “We might be dead but we still have places to be.” He groaned.

I let out a chuckle, then a laugh, next thing I know; I’m laughing so loud that everyone around me was watching me. Once I finally calmed down, I took a deep breath pointed a finger at the man and said as calmly as I could, “No.”

I walked off the line and towards this large brown door that I assumed was the front door. I walked faster when I head the woman behind the counter shouting.

“Sir! Excuse me sir! You can’t leave yet!”

I kept walking and waved my hand in the air towards her. No way in hell am I staying here, these people are obviously some kind of TV show prankers and I am not good with scary shit so: Nope. I’m out.

I bump into a woman holding her pregnant belly bump, and I immediately apologized. She shakes her head, “Besides that, have you seen my baby at all?”

“What?” I said clearly staring at her bump.

“My baby. The little imp ran off not too long ago and it’s almost time for us to go back home so I need to put us back together.” She states

“What?” I repeated

She removes her hand off the baby bump she had and it uncoils, revealing her insides and spilling blood all over the white floor. “Need to put the baby back.”

I stared at the display at the woman’s insides and watched as the blood slowly began spreading towards my black sneaker. I let out a nervous short laugh. What I saw next was the ceiling of wherever the hell I was and then darkness.

I’ve decided at this moment to become a vegetarian.